| I believe there is a place where people live in perfect peace, where there is food on every plate,
where work is rewarded and rest is sweet…
So here I am. Dusting the gravel out of the scrapes on my palms and knees and
refocusing on the Giver of dreams. Sometimes I just have to admit that following
Him isn’t really all that much fun. Now that I think of it, Christ got nailed to a cross
for listening to His Father, so I really can’t complain simply because I’ve got a few
bruises from this business. Where the color of your skin won't get you in or keep you out; where justice reigns and truth
finally wins its hard fought war against fear and doubt… Yah, I applied to be a Rhodes Scholar (full-ride to Oxford University), and I knew
it wasn’t likely to become a reality, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t wish it could be.
When I didn’t get it, sure, I hung my head for a bit. Everybody’s got the dream in
them that they can do something great. Even me, though I’m not really one to throw
my heart into chasing every dream because I know I don’t suffer disappointment well. Everyone I know wants to go there too, but when I ask them how to do it they seem so confused.
Do I turn to the left? Do I turn to the right?
I think over and over lately the Lord has been saying to me “Just wait, Linds. Be patient.
Just wait. Keep looking and you will know the right thing when it comes.” Lately, I’ve
given up aiming for something good and comfortable and wonderful to come of my life.
I’ve started focusing on doing what is right, and in the end I know that it will be what is
good, whether or not it happens to be comfortable. When I turn to the world they gave me this advice: They said, you just follow your heart, but my
heart just led me into my chest…
Oddly enough, sometimes I feel like I automatically pick the hard thing to do when
there are two options in front of me, as though the right thing to do is always
uncomfortable. There is a horrible flaw in this logic. Not just your regular sized flaw… no,
a “who filled my cup with decaf-coffee this morning” or “why is all the rum gone” sized flaw.
Our choices shouldn’t be based on what is easy, or what is difficult for that matter. Our
choices should be based on what is right. They said follow your nose, but the direction changed every time I went and turned my head. And
they said you just follow your dreams, but my dreams were only misty notions… In other, better news, my parents bought me the entire Charlie Brown deluxe holiday
collection. Now I can watch The Great Pumpkin any time I dang well please, even if our
silly television stations don’t play it. Also have a new recipe for scones to try out and
some near perfect coffee to go with it. So I guess life is gonna be oKay. I think. But the Father of hearts, and the Maker of noses, and the Giver of dreams… He's the one I have
chosen… And I will follow Him.
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